Scared of the deep ocean, but I long to see it regardless?

I was looking at a video of the ocean about 30 minutes before I opened my little keyboard to type this sentence and the thought crossed my mind of joining the US Coast Guard. I’m not sure why this thought crossed my mind.

I’m trying to entertain the thought a little. Maybe I just want the benefits of being employed at such a job. The health insurance, dental care, retirement plans? Nope. I don’t really care about any of that. And anyways, I’m banned from entering any part of the military for a few reasons.

I remember now that I’ve also been thinking a lot about the ocean for the past couple of weeks in general. The sounds, the smell, the creatures, and the boats on the water. I’ve thought about myself being on a boat doing hard work for uninteresting pay, getting all of my bones and muscles worn out, with the idea feeling emotionally fulfilling for me.

Maybe that’s just the Mainer in me trying to come out? I’m not sure.

I’ll try and follow up on this in a week or so.